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Songs Lyrics
A-F G-O P-Z Christmas
Paddy Lay Back
(Traditional, altered lyrics by Craig Lutke)

'Twas a cold an' dreary mornin' in December, (December)
And all of me money, it was spent (spent, spent!)
And where the hell it went I can't remember (he's senile)
So back on the account I up and went (went, went!)

(Chorus)
Paddy, lay back (Paddy, lay back) Take in yer slack (take in yer slack)
Take a turn around the capstan, heave a pawl (heave a pawl. Hey!)
'Bout ship, stations, boys, be handy (be handy)
We're bound for Valiporaizor 'round the horn


So I stumbled to the docks a where the ship lay (where she lay)
Sitting with her riggin' tied up high (he's high!)
I got halfway up the gangplank, then I jumped off (fell off)
Convinced like a dolphin I could fly (dolphins fly?)

They cranked me back on board by my dinghy (his dinghy)
A pumping out the water from me gills (pump, pump!)
When the cook came a bargin' from the galley (the galley)
His lack of pants sure gave me the chills (Thrills! Spills!)

Now our Cookie sure knew a thing or two, boys (two boys?)
He could make a meal from weevils, tar, and squid (squid squid!)
So I reached into me pocket for me pay sir (pay sir)
Cause if you don't want to eat, it's 50 quid (plus tax)

Then the first mate up bellows out "Cast Off" (cast off)
So I grabbed the nearest line and gave a heave (heave (barf))
The Gunner squealed and jump over the rail boys (rail boys)
And we weren't sorry to see him leave (duck food)

So I climbed up the shrouds into the crow's nest (the ho's nest)
To keep a one-eyed lookout for the King (King Willie!)
I found where the mate had stashed a hooch hole (hooch hole)
Through the fumes, I couldn't see a thing (light a match!)

By chance, we ran across a prize of value (value)
A stuffed to gunnels with some royal toys (toys toys!)
There were cuffs and whips the Prince he might have missed or mourned (fist horned?)
And something every orifice sure destroys (roys roys!)


For booking information contact Craig Lutke at:
214-415-9563 or by e-mail at

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